Okay, all you other mommies out there - this mommy is in need of a pep talk. None of my nursing or baby books have chapters about mommy developmental stages, but I think I'm going through one, and it's making me sad!
I felt like this about a week after we brought Eden home from the hospital. Overwhelmed, sad, completely in love with my baby but entirely unsure of my own self and surroundings. It didn't take long for me to find my rhythm of nursing and cuddling all day long. And the first month passed beautifully!!
But, now the real world is knocking. It's time for me to buck up and start taking care of the house. We can't eat takeout food forever. And, even though she hates being in the car I have to go out now and then for my own sanity's sake. I gotta figure out some way to juggle things.
I'm at a loss, though. I was such a busy body before Eden came along and now that I've spent a month catering solely to her needs I am skittish about attending to other things. But I miss feeling productive and in control. I'm not so naive as to think that I'm going to live the life the same way I did before. But, let's face it. I am a naturally busy person and there are many children who have wonderful lives despite their naturally busy mothers.
I guess I'm just trying to figure out who this new Molly is. On one hand I'm completely different --new priorities, new schedule, new lifestyle, new everything. On the other hand, I'm still Molly. Who is this new Molly-Mom? How will she handle things? What is important to her? How many car trips can she handle every week with her precious baby screaming bloody murder in the back seat?
So, all you other mommies out there, tell me you went through the same thing and that it gets better and not to worry. I'll figure out my new identity, won't I?
In the meantime, I'm going to go cuddle and nurse my little girl.
3 comments:
It's a rough time - full of contradictions and conflicting emotions. But I promise, it does get better and it gets a whole lot easier too.
As Dave says, "The first eight weeks suck - but it get better from there..."
Hugs to all of you!!
Oh, Molly-Mom. Just the fact that the changes bother you mean you are a great mom. :-) You will find your rythmn. Remember that Eden's been busy with you for the first 40 weeks of her life - she's already used to it!
I love you.
Hilary
Oh, Honey! Remember the One Who is your comforter, helper, guide and standby. Remember Who gave Eden to you because He knew you were the perfect mom for her. He has the answers to all of your questions, and He cuddles you like you cuddle Eden. His love for you is matchless. Mine is a close second.
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